Put Yourself At the Top of That List

I received word this afternoon that a friend from college had a nervous breakdown recently. That bit of news shocked me because she is the last person I would think can suffer a breakdown. She's the ultimate together person. What's more, I heard she is almost catatonic. A few years ago, I was watching the Oprah show. Her guest made a statement that drew a strong reaction from me. She said that as wife and mother, we should put ourselves on top of our priority list. The Filipina is known for being long-suffering and self-sacrificing. I am a Filipina wife and mother and those virtues (?) have been instilled in me since day one. At the time, I vehemently disagreed with that rather courageous statement. But I have had to rethink my position since then. On hindsight, she is right. If you put yourself last all the time, at some point you will burn out. As a Catholic, I was taught to love selflessly. But I was also taught that to be able to truly love others, first I must love myself. You can't be of use to anyone, least of all your family if you are not complete, whole and fulfilled. Your family draws its strength from you, so you have to be really strong for them, too. Therefore, you have to think of your well-being all the time. Otherwise, a breakdown is a looming probability in your horizon.