Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Put Yourself At the Top of That List

I received word this afternoon that a friend from college had a nervous breakdown recently. That bit of news shocked me because she is the last person I would think can suffer a breakdown. She's the ultimate together person. What's more, I heard she is almost catatonic. A few years ago, I was watching the Oprah show. Her guest made a statement that drew a strong reaction from me. She said that as wife and mother, we should put ourselves on top of our priority list. The Filipina is known for being long-suffering and self-sacrificing. I am a Filipina wife and mother and those virtues (?) have been instilled in me since day one. At the time, I vehemently disagreed with that rather courageous statement. But I have had to rethink my position since then. On hindsight, she is right. If you put yourself last all the time, at some point you will burn out. As a Catholic, I was taught to love selflessly. But I was also taught that to be able to truly love others, first I must love myself. You can't be of use to anyone, least of all your family if you are not complete, whole and fulfilled. Your family draws its strength from you, so you have to be really strong for them, too. Therefore, you have to think of your well-being all the time. Otherwise, a breakdown is a looming probability in your horizon.


Amel's Realm said...

I agree with you. We need to recharge our batteries every once in a while...otherwise we'll "explode" he he he he...

It's like warnings on case of emergencies, adults need to put on the gas mask FIRST before helping their kids put on their masks. It's not because of selfishness, but because it's the way it should be...otherwise it will be dangerous for the family.

A Simple Life said...

I totally agree with you, eh sino pang mag-aalaga sa kanila kung hindi mo uunahin ang sarili mo.

sasha said...

So true, tita. I wish your friend will recover soon. Sometimes kasi moms didn't know they're so stressed out na kaya siguro these things happen. When my mom was still alive, she would go on and on until she couldn't stand anymore. Sobrang magtrabaho sa bahay lalo na 5 kaming anak hehe... Di bale sana if it's physical exhaustion lang yan. There are problems to deal with pa and different personalities of the kids. Baka ganyan nangyari sa friend mo, tita.

Anyway, have a nice day po! And thanks for reading my entries :)

A Simple Life said...

Ate gi punta ka sa simple life, hanapin mo sa side bar ko yung pinay mommies, join ka dun, i'm sure marami kang matutulungan dun ;)

Max said...


I think that women are the major force in any society; but this doesn't mean that they must leave themselves for last, that they shouldn't take care of themselves; love themselves first; pamper themselves so that they can love, pamper and dedicate themselves more to their families.

This was an excellent post; great choice of theme :D!

I came to tag you (it is quite an interesting meme, and I have also tagged your SIL, Liza):


Max said...

Better yet; I will come back with another tag that will help you promote your blog :)!

See ya

Max said...

I am back!

I tagged you for this Blog-promotion tag:

I hope you join us!